In college I met a girl who through my roommate who became a friend of mine. She hung out with us at out townhouse and essentially became our fifth roommate (the one who didn't pay any bills). When all of my roommates went home for the summer, my friend (let's call her Michelle) stayed at the house. She worked at a makeup counter and lived in Atlanta by way of California. Her mom had moved the family to Atlanta years ago and when all of the children were out of school, returned to Cali. Michelle's only resources in Atlanta were an aunt and a boyfriend that she loved dearly, but was no good for her at all.
Michelle stayed at the townhouse with me all summer and chipped in on the bills. My husband (who was my boyfriend at the time) and I would drop her off at the library, where we assumed she had a part time job, and go on about our day at work or school. Michelle wouldn't come home every evening, but she did frequent the house and bring groceries and part of the bill money.
I soon found out that Michelle had lost her job at the makeup counter and that she would go to the library to read all day and make us think that was her job. Don't ask where she would get the money for the bills from. She attempted to move in with her boyfriend, but they broke up after his child's mother and his mother (whom he lived with) decided to shut Michelle out of his life and make huge trouble whenever she came around.
Needless to say, two roommates decided not to come back for the fall and a new one moved in with me and my other roommate. Tne new roommate had an aversion to Michelle living with us if she wasn't going to pay full bills. Me and my other roommate leaned on the side of compassion about Michelle's situation- where will she go? She doesn't have anyone else but us!So Michelle stayed for a while until our new roommate's feelings made it uncomfortable for Michelle and we all decided it was best that she move out in favor of keeping a roommate who would split things three ways, if Michelle couldn't pay her share of the bills completely.
I struggled with this decision. Was it the right thing to do? I spoke with my grandmother who explained that everyone and everything had a season in your life. When their purpose in your life or your purpose in theirs has been fullfilled, it's time to go and it's over. Maybe you will cross paths again, maybe not. She said it as simple as that and it didn't seem to help me at all!
Michelle moved out and I tried to call her a few times to no avail. We didn't know where she went or if she was okay and my roommate and I were worried about whether or not we made the right decision. I prayed on it and put it in God's hands.About 6 months later, I was waiting for the bus at Five Points and saw Michelle. She looked great! I ran up and hugged her and she was excited to see me! We spoke while waiting for the bus. She said thank you for putting her out. I was confused. She explained that she was in a period of her life where she wasn't really doing for herself and that when we had to put her out, it made her stand up for herself and take care of business solely depending on herself and not her no good boyfriend who she decided to completely sever ties with. She went back to work at a department store makeup counter and had gotten a connection to work on an independent film set. She was living with her aunt and strengthening relationships with her family again- something she hadn't done while with her boyfriend. Our buses came and we said good bye and she assured me that we would see each other around. I told her I felt bad about what happened. She told me that she didn't and that it was the best thing we could have ever done for her and that she was happy that we did put her out.I haven't seen Michelle since that day, but I learned that when a season is over, learn from it and grow, And most importantly, recognize that everyone and everything has a season in your life!
Tamara Angela Grant is the author of The Cooling Board. Learn more at http://www.peaceinthestormpublishing.com/.
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1 comment:
Tamara, things usually happen for reasons that may not be seen on the surface. Compassion at times can stand in the way when the full story isn't available to fathom ways to allow the scales to be balanced. Michelle had to learn to handle things in an independent way, and at times hard lessons are begat when your back is against the wall.
God knew your heart and your intent. The fact that you opened yourself to her and didn't abandon her when she needed you most says a lot for the passion you had to help. Michelle told you she was grateful that you did what you did, so it worked out the way the Lord had envision it to happen.
ACR
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